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12 May 2010

...Is It As Simple As Black and White?

When I take a load off, not that type of load fellas, but when I sit down to chill and relax sometimes I'll turn to HGTV. Real estate has always been an interest for me so to watch the shows where young professionals that have dreams about their first homes that mirror mine is always an enjoyable thing to do.

This past week while chilling at the crib I saw that "House Hunters" was on. A typical episode is some caucasian couple with a higher than above average budget being ultra picky about their wants and desires in a home. But, what made this episode different was this time they had these two dudes who had been a relationship for a couple of years trying to move to a different state to grow both professionally and socially.

Now, it was cool to see these two cats trying to do something that regular couples do on a daily basis. But I got to thinking...

Maybe we should start at home with ourselves and we can find answers from there.....

Do we, as African-American men, have the balls to actually fully commit to another dude and make major moves with that dude like buying a house and helping each other find careers so that they are both successful? Or, are we too influenced by our traditional ideals, too afraid of what people will say, too insecure about our manhood, that we couldn't fathom the thought of letting it be known that this is the person we want to make these types of moves with?

It's harder for us. We not only have to deal with those traditional ideas we've been taught all our lives of what family is, but we have to convince Christian, mostly Southern Christian families and friends that what we are doing is not the greatest sin known to man. On top of that we have to get over our own egos and our own doubts and our own insecurities.

Am I saying its easier for our white counterparts? Yes, I am saying it is easier. But is that an excuse to live our lives determined by the thoughts of others?

And, lets not forget that we are on a consistent battle to advance in our professional careers and having to deal with the snide comments and rude looks from co-workers, both at our levels professionally and those who sign our paychecks.

Just something to think about...

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